I swear my naughty & perverted top is nice

It was so funny I received a number of comments and emails suggesting that the language in one of my recent Facebook update wasn’t like me. A friend even thought my account was hacked! I was so tickled; I must have managed to beguile many of you by coming across as really ladylike. So if it’s not ladylike to swear, then I must be most unrefine to wear a top that is embroidered with a phrase containing a dirty word. Yes, it says “No time to fuck”. Well, do I look vulgar to you?

I fell in love with Locher’s naughty tops back in 2007 and had badly wanted to get hold of one. The tops all look very innocently sweet and it’s only upon closer examination that you would have noticed that the embroidered words are wickedly perverted. However, they were all so expensive! So I never got to buy them until now when I stumbled upon the online shop going on a sale. Of course I had to grab one quickly! My favorite was actually top number 4 but unfortunately, it was already sold out. I’ll just have to wait till the next sale to get that one.

Anyway, other than no time to fuck, the others are:
I don’t play nice
I like it rough
Life is fucked up
Fucked in the head
Good luck. Motherfucker
I ain’t your fucking sweetheart
I really need a fuckin coffee
Don’t you fucking look at me

Although I like the perversion, but there are a few I have issues with and will never be able to bring myself to wear. Like:

I love porn
I hate children
Will fuck for shoes
Dirty little lovemaker
Best piece of ass in town
Sorry girls, good girls don’t swallow
I can only please one man a day. Today is not your day and tomorrow doesn’t look good either.

But back to my new top. I was so excited to receive it and couldn’t wait to wear it. I like the tag which says “This garment’s perfection can only be surpassed by the woman that wears it. It was fashioned in Paris with lots of love, passion and care. Just remember this darling, never ever lend this shirt to a friend, not even your best because you will never get it back again…”

And the truth is, I swear a lot in private. As a matter of fact, I have an indecent foul mouth and I spout all sorts of profanities. When I’m angry. When I’m irritated. When I’m stressed. And even when I’m bored. In fact, my husband and I like to swear at one another. Mostly for fun but sometimes we hurl the most vicious obscenities at each other when we’re extremely mad too. You would never imagine, looking at me, the type of expletives that I use. Not just the standard English four-letter word you see here. Nah. That’s so mild. I am the Hokkien vulgar queen and the language I use are truly offensive. They are usually those unique concoctions uttered by the local Ah Beng hooligans to describe sexual organs and sexual acts. However, unless I’m provoked, I rarely curse publicly. Thankfully, I find it impolite, inappropriate and very uncool. To me, cursing is just a way to vent. Thus, I only curse in private, confined mostly to the four walls in my home or inside my car, and not within the earshot of my child too. But I often wish I’ve got a loud speaker installed outisde my car so that I can swear aloud at inconsiderate drivers.

How about you? Do you swear? And would you wear a Locher’s top?

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  1. youngorgeous says:

    this is a side of you we rarely see!
    imagine if the quotes are right smack on the chest!

  2. sesame says:

    I won’t wear if it’s big words across the chest. Heheh. I like this cos it comes across as understated. Not too loud and obvious.

  3. crazymommy says:

    Hahaaa. I swear in hokkien privately too, got more kick than angmoh swearing IMO. LOL

    But then… i don’t think I will ever dare to wear something like the top you are wearing. I’m… just a paper tiger lah. ?

  4. Soos says:

    Hahaha! We all have potty-mouth moments. My husband told his cigar friend I have picked up the friend’s special way of saying “jack-ASS” where appropriate and the friend was incredulous. I said this is what the friend, another friend and I have in common: we do not suffer IDIOTS!

    The top is cute – you are so thin and def do NOT look like Lucy Liu! Still, what anyone wears can leave her open to criticism or questioning. I have no strong opinion pro or con on this particular blouse. The meaning is open to question. Happy wearing!

  5. Vonvon says:

    LOL! *High 5* to swearing in Hokkien! If you are the queen then I am princess only. ? My Hokkien not quite good.

    OK, back to your top….all pretty, sweet and elegant, even down to the embroidered flowers. Even the words are ‘nicely done’ as in the embroidery la. ? But nay, don’t think dare to wear this out.

  6. sesame says:

    Hokkien versions have more kick. I agree. LOL!

  7. sesame says:

    Haha…”jack-ASS” is not something commonly heard here. I have never used that but I’ll be interested to hear your version. ?

    As for the blouse, I’ll not be surprised that some pple consider it in poor taste. But well, I like it and yes, am happy wearing it. ?

  8. MsLips says:

    Very nice top! That was the one I had my eye on too but alas I don’t think they had L size. I have reservations about wearing Locher’s tops cos of the swear words. But maybe I’ll aim for one with French naughty words haha. I am relatively mild when it comes to swearing confining myself to the good old 4-letter word in times of undue stress or irritation (read: mostly while driving). But my family is appalled that I even utter that word.

  9. sesame says:

    You do??? Surprised! I thought it’ll be the cantonese versions. Muahahaha… I hear a lot of that in M’sia. The Hokkien ones are less common I thought. But anyhow, *High 5* ?

  10. sesame says:

    You swear while driving too? But I’m not so surprised, given the type of reckless drivers we have here. Those are the times I swear most too.

    Those with French words got no kick for me cos I don’t know what they mean. And did you take a look at the designer? She looks rather serious and straight-laced.

  11. Rose says:

    I don’t believe you..

  12. chenyze says:

    nice to know a different side of you! but i’m impressed that you’ve kept things so professional here (=

  13. BlovetBeauty says:

    whao.. get a load of catchy language.I have never really pictured u as a foul mouthed but then again, which lady hasn’t sworn before!

  14. sesame says:

    That I swear?

  15. sesame says:

    Nah. There’s no need to swear here. Also, I don’t like to use swear words in public.

  16. sesame says:

    It’s hard to tell just from pictures and words. ?

  17. CT says:

    This is irrelevant to the topic. Where is the place where you have the photos taken? I wanna go there to pak tok…

  18. pf1123 says:

    I don’t use vulgar language. Or very seldom. Even if I ever did, I can’t even remember when was the last time I did. The curse words I use are rather mild and can’t be said to be vulgarities at all.

    When I’m mad, I would shout and scold people, but never vulgarities. I find it rather unbecoming.

    And just a personal opinion, I find that people who curse most of the time curse when they can’t do anything else. Not me. If I’m unhappy, I make sure things are straighten out according to my liking. Will not accept anything less. Yep. ?

  19. pf1123 says:

    Oh, needless to say, I won’t buy/wear any Locher’s top.

    No offense, Sesame. ?

  20. sesame says:

    This is at Seletar Airbase. It used to be a really nice place until they started building the aerospace park and destroyed the lovely nature. But you can still check out Sunset Grill & Pub at140B Piccadilly. Nice food and beer.

  21. sesame says:

    I consider it extremely rude to swear in public and utterly unprofessional to use swear words at workplace. To me, swear words are okay in your own personal confines but very unsavory when you use it in front of others. It’s definitely a earsore!

    And about the blouse, no worries…it’s not something that has mass appeal. Haha…but that’s why I like it. ?

  22. Jyoan says:

    WOW! The tops are very nice! My style. LOL, but the words are not my style though. I so rarely curse my friends Wow when I use something quite mild like “damn”. I even refrain from using “hell”. lol. But the tops are nice!!

  23. Natalja says:

    I totally love it. I wish I had something like that. Sometimes I would prefer my clothing to say what I realistically wouldn’t say myself. Kind of expression of “inner” me.

  24. fwy says:

    I only swear under my breath when I am pissed. Most of the time, I will go “Good Lord!”, “Jesus!”, etc…

  25. sesame says:

    My mild versions are “basket” and “fish”. Haha…

  26. sesame says:

    What you said is interesting…I think that’s what the designer had intended. People who want to express their inner feelings…

  27. sesame says:

    Ah…that’s funny cos I try to refrain from using godly words. Even for OMG, it’s usually Oh My Gosh or Oh My Goodness for me.

  28. kt says:


    lol, I love the “you suck” one

  29. sesame says:

    Oh that one is cute! ?

  30. Soos says:

    “jack-ASS” = a slightly milder version of “f**king a$$hole”

  31. Happyfeet says:

    This is a really funny and personable post. I can never, never bring myself to swear, whether publicly or privately. I don’t know why. Not even when I am insanely angry. I just keep really silent. IMHO, swearing in public is bad taste, especially for ladies. When I hear well-dressed young ladies using expletives as punctuation, I begin to see them in bad light, no matter how pretty they are, as there is an absence of social graces.

  32. sesame says:

    I didn’t know that! Thanks for telling me. ?

  33. sesame says:

    When I was a little girl, I made a vow to myself never to utter a swear word. Haha…promises are meant to be broken.

    But yes, I agree totally. Using them in public signals a lack of social graces. I’ll be sacked if I ever use it in my workplace. Haha…

  34. Vonvon says:

    I speak both Hokkien and Cantonese, so can swear in both la….:P

  35. sesame says:

    I see…heheh.

  36. pansy says:

    The Locher tops are gorgeous! Which online website has them on sale? $69 usd is expensive for a tee =)


  37. sesame says:

    Lochers is only available on their online store. I bought this a few weeks ago when they had a sale and the tops were going at 50% discount. The sale has ended but it seems they have it quite frequent – follow their tweets or facebook.

  38. Chantana says:

    The top is nice.. but I think I’m too conservative to wear it! lolx

    I never swear before also… I curse but without vulgar.

  39. sesame says:

    You’re a sweet girl! Ah…don’t get started on swearing cos you can’t stop when you start. Haha…

  40. Kaye says:

    Haha Omg! I love it! Super! Imma have that kind of print on my short too

  41. Kaye says:

    Haha Omg! I love it! Super! Imma have that kind of print on my shirt too! Thanks for Sharing!

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